Biology is Unavoidable

We actually had a kid free night yesterday which is why I chose to spend the evening cuddled up with my honey instead of in my usual state of being engrossed in my laptop. Lena went out to dinner with her friend's family last night and wanted to stay over. Since it was one of the rare occasions the mom was home I let her get away with it being a school night. The kids ride the same bus, are in the same class, and they only live a couple blocks away so I let it slide. 

As you can see though, her best friend just happens to be a boy. She's never particularly meshed with other girls. We tried Girl Scouts for a couple years and I had hoped she'd make a few friends, but no such luck. She would much rather climb trees, hunt for bugs, and play in the dirt. We have a box FULL of Barbies and it really only appeals to Anne. Lena's prefered entertainment / style of play has made it rather difficult to connect with other girls her age. While it worries my sister into a tizzy that Lena will have problems later on, it doesn't really stress me out. My best friend is a boy and we've been part of each other's lives for the last two decades without any issues (but that's another story I suppose).

His mom and I were talking last night when they swung by to get her some PJs and fresh clothes for the morning and we were talking about how much they've been growing lately. We ended up talking about how will we know when it's time to seperate them a bit and end the sleepovers. With his mom being gone as much as she is, he's at our house constantly. While his older brother is there to watch him, he seems to prefer it at our house when she's away at work. We've sorta unofficially adopted him. I help him with his homework, I make sure he showers, I make sure he's fed, I do his laundry, and I sign his notebook for school. Both James and I feel he needs the stability of a parent being there for him and we don't mind a bit. 

But as she pointed out, they're getting older. Things like armpit hair are starting to develop. Their hormones are starting to kick in, though I don't believe those hormones are a factor currently. Right now, they're still embarrassed to be seen in public together and both of them freaked out a couples weeks ago when I took them to Subway in town and a classmate saw them. They immediately attempted to hide and sneak out, but it was already too late. They'd been spotted and I was not leaving without dinner. 

It's still food for thought though. Yes they act more like siblings at the moment, but when is the right time to define the fact that they're not. How do I take away basically her only friend at some point just because he's a boy. I'm not sure. His mom is not sure. It doesn't seem fair to think about splitting them up, but at some point biology is going to play a factor. Any pointers on what I should watch out for?